Not all who are lost wander.

 Is it possible to be lost while remaining in the same place? Apparently. 

I've worked at the same job for 9 years. I've been the mother of 3 kids for 10 years. I've lived at the same address for 11 years. I've been married to the same man for 12 years. I've lived in the same state for 15 years. I've lived in this same body for 43 years. Yet somehow I have lost my way. How, in the midst of so much apparent stability, has my life completely derailed?

Ironically, I think the mounting stability is what allowed the reality of my chronic instability to be exposed. Without the distraction of significant life changes or personal crises to keep me from paying attention to myself, I have become more and more cognizant of just how poorly I have cared for myself over the years. I lived at a pace that was not sustainable. And now that the tornado of college degrees, relationship changes, pregnancies, address changes, and job changes finally seems to have passed and everything has become still, it seems that I don't know where I am. I don't know where I am.

I am now on the journey of getting un-lost. I don't even fully know what that means. Finding myself? Finding my purpose? Finding peace? Finding healing? Finding God? All of the above? Maybe they are all one and the same. 

Knowing that I'm lost is half the battle. Exploring what lies ahead...and what lies within...is both exhilarating and terrifying. All I know is staying lost isn't an option.